MARTYR Poetry Compendium, Volume Three - "The Dying of the Next Beginning"
Composed/Compiled/Written by BLACKBIRD & JUSTICE

July 1996 - July 1997
Released at Montreal on July 20th, 1997


Dear Readers and Poets,

        Welcome to the world's third cyberspace poetry group composition
pack. In the following documents, I have enclosed our complete portfolio of
poetry since July 1996 for the July 1997 release of Martyr Poetry
Compendium, Volume Three.
	First, I should explain how all of this came to be. The story thus
far begins back in November 1994 and progresses to the present. Right now, I
am a University student in History & English at McGill University who happens
to write poetry in my spare time as a hobby. In the beginning, my poetry was
a very private, personal affair to me. I never thought my writing, whether
prose or poetry, was any good, until I showed my girlfriend at the time some
of my works.
	Upon reading them, she was favorably impressed and persuaded me to
publish them, but humility still held me back. However, the positive feedback
I got encouraged me to continue writing and gave me the courage to show
others and obtain a second opinion from those wiser than I, such as my
parents and my English teacher. My parents were surprised that I had hidden
such talent from them for so long mainly because I had never demonstrated
anything worth being proud of to them before. They encouraged me to explore
my potential even further and helped with their useful criticisms and helpful
pointers. In the end, this improved my overall outlook and allowed me to take
things a step further.
	I handed my first attempt at serious poetry in as an important term
assignment for English class, putting my marks at risk on the slim chance
that my teacher would love it and endorse me. Sure enough, my hard work and
dedication paid off, for I returned to class the next day to discover that I
was marked 100% on that assignment. The teacher even commented that I should
publish the poem in the school newspaper, but I refused because I felt the
"Student Eye" was an irresponsibly written newspaper exclusively dominated
only by the elite students. These so-called advanced and gifted students
wrote boring, typical articles and poetry that didn't show an ounce of
sincerity. Moreover, they rarely permitted those from outside their petty
social circle to publish in the paper unless you reduced yourself to becoming
their slave-dog. I was not about to kiss their feet simply for the
"privilege" of putting my poem in their ditty paper.
	I continued to write more poems, straying even further from prose,
and continued with new support to draw from my life experiences the
inspiration necessary for composing good quality poems.
	As you can probably tell from reading them, I have a very distinct,
neo-gothic style to the way I compose with a touch of manic depressive. This
comes mainly from the fact that I am indeed a manic depressive. I don't mean
to go on about my horrible life, but society hasn't exactly treated me fairly
on many accounts. A lot of this resentment translates into misunderstood
hatred toward all world religions, our political and economic systems, and
our social system. This is all presented in an articulate, but gothic manner
that sometimes suggests that there is hope and salvation for humanity, though
not from a divinity, but rather from within ourselves.
	My constant obsession with gothicism has to do with my background and
what prose influences I had as an early adolescent. DragonLance and Star Trek
had a hand in making my poetry the way it is today, however I hope to
eventually break the pattern and master other forms of poetry someday.
	What gave me the idea to put together a poetry pack stems from my
love for tracked computer music (or wave music, as I prefer to label it). I
figured if tracked computer music packs can be done, then so should poetry.
After all, poetry and music share a lot in common. For one thing, they are
both part of what is called "Fine Arts". Also, musical lyrics (though you'll
never see any in tracked computer music for it is largely instrumental by
nature) are often simply converted or modified poems. Therefore, this makes
my project a logical endeavor, doesn't it?
	Of course, this idea was never going to get off the ground unless
several coincidences and fate stepped in. At this point in time, starting a
poetry group was a farfetched idea in the back of my mind. On July 20th of
1995, a miracle occurred in a chance discovery that someone else other than
myself was posting poems, albeit in French, on a BBS I frequented often. I
began to immediately start discussing with this new cyberpoet about my ideas
for the group (which didn't even have a name or theme yet) and he became the
vice-president of this newly formed group. The man's alias was Bleeding
Shadow and he became instrumental in determining the group's future. We
developed the theme: neo-gothicism, as well as the name Martyr. I chose to
name it this because the main theme of our poetry tied in perfectly with the
title of a fantasy short story I was working on before that time. Eventually,
after much contribution from Bleeding Shadow, he had other obligations that
forced him to abandon the group and I was left alone to deal with the turmoil
of his passing.
	It wasn't long before Morlock entered the picture. He was another
poet on the very same BBS, however only recently decided to post poetry in
early September. I was the first to notice his raw talent and incorporated
him into the group as my protg, in order to fill in the role Bleeding
Shadow left behind as the innovative spark behind Martyr. Since then, he has
contributed his works in a manner which can only be described as exemplary.
	The image of the group began to take shape finally as Morlock and I 
contemplated the purpose behind Martyr. The idea of a group constitution and
the Internet as our desktop publishing medium were all our combined ideas.
The goal of the group became "the preservation of the lost art of poetry..."
and that brings me to the release of the Martyr Poetry Compendium, Volume
One...
        After the success of this aforementioned first group release, MorlocK
and I continued to convene together in order to reassure the group's future
as we were left with only two surviving members. At this time, I began
working with a woman named "justice" on some poetic projects and began to
realize that she was just perfect for what the group needed: raw talent.
"justice" was a beginner poet with very little experience in her portfolio at
the time she joined, but has made something remarkable of herself and her
experience in the art of poetry since then.
        At this time, I was also working with my college's poetry publication
and came across an outcast of that group, namely Luca. He has been a
wonderful inspiration to us all and been a great friend to me. I wish him the
best and hope you enjoy poetry from these new members.
        Soon after that, I constructed the World Wide Web and FTP sites for
MARTYR on the Internet through our Internet Provider, Axess Communications.
Everything began happening so fast and as usual, my poetry flourished.
MorlocK and I decided to make a special Valentine's Day release under our own
independent labels, so thus was born Blackbird Poetry Pack II and MorlocK
Poetry Pack I. The themes in MorlocK's touch base on the dark side of
romance, while mine was more of a personal nature in the dark mind of
Blackbird (with some romance, of course).
        Since that duo-release, MorlocK has announced that he's moving away
and therefore leaving the group. Without an Organizer, I named "justice" to
the position because I felt that she was the most qualified to handle the
position. Also, the group has since fallen into some turmoil. This chaos is
the result of considerable ordeals in finance which has resulted in a small
cumulative debt. This does not mean that MARTYR is in serious danger of
folding, but for awhile there was a great deal of concern. There was also a
time when I thought about retiring to pursue other interests (like living
romance for a change!), but chose to maintain MARTYR as long as I could
effectively remain creative in poetry. So, all is well now that I'm revising
the rules and adding the e-zine to our distribution network on the Internet
for lower group maintenance. And that just about brings us to the release of
MARTYR Poetry Compendium, Volume Two...
        Increasingly, more and more problems have plagued MARTYR, holding
back any effective growth I attempted. This past year has seen vast changes
in the entire structure and backbone of the group and disasters beyond
imagination. For one thing, AXESS.COM (our ISP) raised their prices steeply,
so high that I was forced to leave the ISP in search of a cheaper alternative
which I found in COLBA.NET (then called INFINI.NET) so our sites moved there.
Despite the really bad support service there, MARTYR managed to setup a web
site of sorts, but FTP was out of the question for several reasons.
        This is where things complicated themselves. I resolved to expand
MARTYR's role in the realm of cyberart, so I went out to dig up some music
members and graphists so that we would tighten our hold on the digital
"fine arts". Thus, we entered the wide world of the demoscene and it sure has
been an eye-opener for me. I scouted for new members and came across some
new talent waiting to be unleashed: Subliminal, MikPos, and Maverick. One of
the things I didn't realize early on was how prolific our musicians were and
how much server space demomusic took up. I was only given 2MB of free server
space and couldn't afford the cost per extra MB per month it would take to
use my web site as an FTP site. So, a lot of the music didn't become available
to the public until later. After that, Subliminal recommended EViL SEED to
join and I persuaded Supahfly to join MARTYR after USED broke up here in
Montreal after the NAID 1996 Demo Party. MorlocK even returned during the
late part of Summer 1996 with a potential recruit, Smiles, who we welcomed
into our folds. Unfortunately, she left before ever releasing anything to us.
        Maverick eventually had to leave due to his new job overworking him
to the point of not having enough free time to devote to composing music
anymore. His New Age appeal will indeed be missed. As for the other members,
they have should a variety of talent in musical style and ability spectrums.
A well-rounded bunch of individuals to form a beautiful combination.
        Unfortunately, finding graphists hasn't been easy. We had found one
before last summer purely by accident, but while made beautiful images, his
pictures took up too much space... far more than was necessary in his waste
of extra colors and resolution. They also lacked originality because each
seemed like a slightly different take on the same idea: a swirling vortex.
Subliminal recommended Pergatory, who has stayed with the group and is
demonstrating both promising artistic skill and pragmatism.
        During this time, we also switched Internet Service Providers (ISPs).
We jumped to an even cheaper alternative, MYTH.ORG, which allowed us unlimited
server space so our headquarters were there, but only for a short-lived amount
of time since the ISP folded due to bankruptcy. I moved back to COLBA.NET
while our distribution headquarters moved to work between ORACLEBBS.COM and
PLAZMA.NET in the United States of America.
        Presently, our sites are located at PLAZMA.NET for anyone who is
interested. Yet even that situation is precarious and not at all permanent.
What will the future ensure for MARTYR? I'm not entirely certain, but don't
be surprised if we move to another site or get our own MARTYR.ORG site.
        We lived, but we have not conquered. The cyberart world has changed
since we began to become less competitive, more cooperative. The designation
of being in a group no longer carries the same meaning. What will be the key
issue is to see if MARTYR survives the evolution.
        What of a MARTYR without Blackbird? I was almost tempted to leave due
to the severe financial and time constraints MARTYR placed on me this time
around the block. My role became more administrative (with justice organizing
CyberLit - poetry and short stories - and Subliminal organizing Demoscene -
music, graphics, and demos) and less artistic. Bureaucracy grew exponentially
as I had to majorly revise the rules twice since this term began. I will
remain in MARTYR nonetheless because it's my baby and I enjoy doing it.
        However, I will not be paying anything beyond my usual Internet bill
so the financial drain is going to stop. MARTYR is going to suffer great
changes as an inevitable result of these forces being unleashed. I have also
realized that demoscene and cyberlit factions cannot work cooperatively in
the same environment, thus will be separate. 
        Since this time, many changes have occurred. MARTYR has made a split
into two distinct groups. MARTYR has now become an exclusively demoscene
group only, while a spin-off has been spawned: MARTYR PHASE II (MP2). This new
spin-off is a backpedal to the earlier times MARTYR lived in, namely poetry
and short stories only. It is under the administrative care of justice with
Blackbird in tow as a contributing member and webmaster at its new AXESS.COM
headquarters in Montreal. We are presently looking for new talent, so please
e-mail us to join.
        MARTYR itself has evolved on its own, as well. Pergatory released a
graphics pack before leaving the group due to lack of time and commitment. My
responsibilities within MARTYR are administrative only, especially since
Subliminal recently retired to pursue his own musical dreams. Our site has
been secured at PLAZMA.NET for the time being.
        The future is uncertain for both groups, but there are a couple of
assurances. This will be the last MARTYR Poetry Compendium released under
MARTYR as a unified group. Any future releases will be MP2 independent works.
I, Blackbird, have also made the conscious decision to stop writing poetry
for awhile to concentrate more on living life and learning (school!), while
I lazily labor at a short novel project, which will eventually be released
under MP2. justice is still planning the specifics of MP2 so this new group
hasn't quite been fleshed out as of yet, but soon will be well defined.
Suffice it to say that MP2 is a small Internet poetry group whose members
learn from and teach each other cooperatively and put out a yearly poetry
pack. There will likely be provisions for short story writers included. The
atmosphere is intended to be more relaxed and much less administrative.

	Each poem is virtually months of work, although the rough draft is
usually completed within the first two hours of composition. The refining
process is what takes forever: changing sentence structure, substituting
words through the use of a thesaurus, adding new passages, changing the
presentation form, choosing the proper fonts to got with the mood of the
poem, organizing a group of poems into a portfolio, etc. All of this is a
LONG process, but the final product is usually something wonderful, unique,
and dynamic. At least, I'd like to think so. I certainly hope you do as well,
gentle reader, after all once you've read this far, there's no turning back
now.

"Let me implore, I adore forevermore" - blackbird@colba.net


DEDICATIONS, GREETINGS, HONORABLE MENTION:
==========================================


        This poetry pack has been a full year in the making and during this
long period, the walls have been marred by the faces of those who inspired
each of us to continue even when times were fragile and spirits were weak.
For this reason, these inspirational people are mentioned in the credits of
our third publication.


<<< Blackbird wishes to thank the following for their support... >>>

* The entire demoscene & #trax: "for many unusual, interesting IRC filled 
  nights. You people kept me laughing :-)"
* Force Ten (F10) Demo Music Group: "for writing emotionally moving pieces of
  instrumental music that permitted my inspiration to soar into what it is
  today. Keep releasing... I need your music more than ever"
* ShawnM of NOISE Demo Music Group: "thanks for all the great philosophical
  (yeah right!) conversations and the fun times. Your music is breathtaking"
* Harry of NOISE Demo Music Group: "I'm still waiting on that acid-goth tune
  by the way! Hehehehehe. Your New Age Trance and Acid Dance music was 
  definitely the best dance music I've ever heard, commercial or otherwise"
* DeltaX of NOISE Demo Music Group: "Love your New Age and our #noise 
  conversations. Keep up with your music. I see the potential of a star in 
  you"
* Subliminal: "What can I say? Your music and writing is heartwrenching, man. 
  You've been probably my best friend when times were tough and nobody else
  was around. You've seen me and MARTYR through the worst and your undying
  loyalty and friendship will never be forgotten" 
* MikPos: "Your New Age has inspired many poems. I hope your music takes you
  to some of the places it has taken me in my dreams someday"
* MorlocK: "Lately, I've been missing you a lot. You were MARTYR essentially.
  In your absence, MARTYR has never been the same. Our talks and good times
  still reign supreme in my memories, experiences, and in my works"
* Morlock: "You gotta give the monkeys trees to climb :-) Hahahahahaha"
* Catherine Coghlan: "Thanks for your spiritual guidance. It helped clear up
  a lot of confusion in my life and it has greatly helped my poetry. Don't be
  too surprised, but your spiritual influence and warm friendship changed the
  face of my poetry even until now"
* Milou: "Merci pour notre journe ensemble. Puis, encore je vous trouve bien
  plus sexy que Cindy Crawford!"
* Bleeding Shadow: "You helped make it all possible in the first place. I wish
  you could have been around to enjoy the creative process from beginning to 
  end. I think if you had, we might have become better acquainted. I am in 
  your debt forever"
* EViL SEED: "For the most unusual music symphony I've heard to date and for
  being our wake up call when morale was down. Big thanks for your generous
  MARTYR archive on the ORACLEBBS.COM FTP server"
* DooMDeaD of PLAZMA.NET: "Thanks for the hard work and dedication toward 
  continuing the MARTYR dream that began in Montreal. Your contribution being
  the free donation of server space on PLAZMA.NET which was is now our beacon"
* The ETEXT Archives volunteers: "Thanks for permitting MARTYR a place in 
  history among the other published writers out there, even though we have a 
  long way to go and hardly deserve it"
* Depth: "Most of all I can thank you for was your support behind the greater
  vision we shared of demoscene and poetry working together in harmony. I 
  wish our dreams had come true. Perhaps one day when minds are less closed 
  to the concept of cyberart. Your advice still remains precious and dear to
  my heart as was your hearty friendship" 
* Frost Byter: "You're not Supernothing, you're Supereverything! Get some 
  Prozak and then get a life, damn it! We love you, FB! Besides, who wouldn't
  with that sexy voice of yours? :-) Hehehehehehe"
* Ara: "For a Jesus Freak, you're pretty cool. Of course, Jesus was a hippie 
  for his time and everyone seemed to get along just fine with him, too (even
  though he didn't allow free love)"
* Supahfly: "The best drummer in Montreal and our most nationalist member. 
  Le premier ministre du pays souverain de MARTYR!"
* ARCADY Poetry Tribe: "For showing me how NOT to be a poet. You embody every
  stereotype about poetry I hate. Thank gawd I didn't get caught up in your
  hippie web of sex, drugs, booze and bad writing! :-)"
* PLAZMA.NET Poetry Consortium: "An awesome talented bunch of poets"
* justice: "More than anything that fills me with artistic expression, you 
  are that origin point, that locus that my mind, body, and soul orbit around
  endlessly. Your love has given me greater challenges and greater hope, both
  in my personal and artistic life. Our hopes and dreams might never happen,
  but they will forever be immortalized in my poetry, but more importantly in
  our hearts for all time"
* my childhood friends: "For being there when I didn't need you and for not
  being there when I did need you"
* Shawn Drisdelle: "for our late night chats about nothing and everything, 
  life and philosophy. Good luck with your life. Thanks to you, mine improved
  greatly"
* Hydromet BBS: "For being the biggest center of artists and freaks in 
  Montreal. Thanks for the good times and the memories"
* Steve Grant, SysOp of Myth-Tical Circuits BBS and MYTH.ORG: "You were our
  torch when times got too tough to bear. Thank you for being friend, mentor,
  supporter, and savior in MARTYR's time(s) of need. We will never forgot, 
  nor stop appreciating your selfless sacrifices for our cause"
* Microsoft: "For making my 3 favorite utilities: DOS, Windows, and EDIT"
* Digital Cafe BBS: "For providing me and my modem with endless hours of fun
  and music"
* #poetry: "For being the biggest schmooze fest alive. I wish someone would
  have the guts to be honest in their criticism someday. Also, less talk and
  more poetry readings! :-("
* REC.ARTS.POEMS: "The definitive newsgroup for lamer poets who couldn't get
  published and want to waste time and space"
* Luca: "If the poetry doesn't work, maybe modeling? :-) <joke>"
* Daisy May: "For all the fun and drives you gave me. Thanks for lending me
  the Nine Inch Nails CD! :-)"
* Pergatory: "Despite the short time you were with us, your art touched me
  in profound ways that even I am at a loss to explain in words. Suffice it to
  say that we wish you luck in the art world! :-)"
* mak0: "I wish you had stayed on in MARTYR as our coder. Somehow I think we
  could have forged some real fun and shown the world what MARTYR was capable
  of if allowed to roam free in creative bliss"
* Lord: "Thanks for making TVRDEMO. I apologize for rarely using it. Keep on
  coding because with your ability, companies will be at your feet begging"
* Seth Able Robinson: "I love LORD!!! Keep making awesome games to distract
  me from my homework :-)"
* my parents: "For the worst years of my life and the best poetry that was
  the outcome"
* my grandfather: "I wish I had the chance to meet you. Your loss has affected
  me in ways I never thought possible, as expressed in my poems"
* justice's grandfather: "Thanks for being the father I never had. I only hope
  to live up to your expectations and your character someday"
* Edgar Allan Poe: "The ultimate gothic poet to date which later taught me to
  experiment with my works otherwise they remain the senseless same"


<<< justice wishes to thank the following for their support... >>>

* my mother: "for inspiration, guidance, and friendship"
* my grandparents: "for the same"
* my brother: "Ice666, thanks for the inspiration (i.e. your obnoxious ways
  that make me need to let everyone know just how obnoxious it is. Oh yeah,
  and it's fun to freak you out! :-)"
* my father: "thanks for not being there so I can write about it"
* my best friend: "ummmmmmmmm, I've known you since we were two. Need I say
  more?"
* my love interest: "My love for you knows no bounds and neither does my
  poetry about you. Your loving me created my poetry (whether it is about you
  or not). Any success I have is attributed to you. I love you and thank you."
* Mr. Stan Asher: "whose inspiring personality (and enlightening English
  class) gave me the NEED to write 'while Six Million burned'. I am forever
  in your debt."
> "NEVER AGAIN" - justice@colba.net



        We thank you for your continued support of MARTYR and invite you to
visit our Web and FTP sites on the Internet. Until then, the creativity at
MARTYR will slow down over the summer and well into the Fall. We trust you
will be pleasantly surprised by the bursts of innovation in quality of our
works and until then... enjoy your summer!

                                                        - blackbird / justice
